Sew Panda

Things kept dragging on to the point I just crept further into an anxiety-filled depression.

October 1 was our deadline, and it came and went without us being able to move. Eventually things got very, very nasty with The Bad Lady, who at first had been saying she was not going to evict us, then switched her tune to trying to threaten us and acting like she had already begun the process. It got so bad I contacted a lawyer, who assured me that she couldn’t legally follow through on her threats. If she had begun the eviction process, we would have been notified.

We were finally able to move into our home the week of Thanksgiving. When you get a mobile home, there’s a lot of setup, and a lot of repairs. It still isn’t finished! It’s livable though, and that’s what counts. Even with the issues we’re having with this home, we’re so much better off and healthier here. The old home was full of mold. Apparently walls were rotted through to the vinyl as well, and we had no idea. The roof needed a lot of repair. We had rodents, as I had canceled Orkin thinking we would move sooner than we did. We’ve lived here a month and a half, and she still hasn’t moved into our old home.

As stressful and upsetting as everything was, I’m glad we have moved. We’re all healthier and happier. That doesn’t mean I can ever get over the shit that brought us here.

We’re no closer to having a place to move to. Hubs has gotten a new job, so at least we have some progress going on. He’s lucky to have snagged a full-time job, it’s just very physical and he’s not getting any younger so I worry about him. During his first full week at work my mother-in-law and I went to view a home. There was a tree hanging over the mountain about to land on the home, the layout was a nightmare, it didn’t have a bathtub, and the dehumidifiers running throughout the home were just a part of why it was a solid no. I came home feeling so dejected. Depression and anxiety are definitely ramping up.

Word got back to me that the lady who bought our home said that she was told the land was offered to us at, and I quote, “a great deal.” I knew either the lady who sold the land was lying, or the one who bought it was. We decided to check with the chick who sold it. She had said in the past that she was tired of the hassle of this land, which I also addressed in my message to her. The only hassle she had from us was cashing a check every month. She was completely hands off with everything. Maintaining the land was completely on us. I wasn’t accusatory or out of line, just asked if she had said what we had heard and stated that everything is a nightmare. She messaged back with, “It’s easy to type shit, call me.” Stupid me called her, expecting some sort of discussion. She just tore into me.

She let me know that she’s pissed that my mother-in-law didn’t buy the land years ago when it was offered for way more than what it’s worth. She tried saying that my husband turned down an offer to have the land for free. “Put him on the phone.” I put it on speaker phone. By that point she had already told me that I’m a whore, that my whole family is trash, and laughed because we sold our trailer for nothing. I lost my temper and cussed her out. She seemed triggered when I called her a cunt, acting like I was completely out of line when she had already said I was a whore and called us trash. Yeah.

My husband began doubting himself after I hung up on her. “Did I misunderstand something?” I was there when he called her when she started saying she would deed the land to the county if no one would take it. It was directly after the storm, and we only had internet to view her post on facebook because we were on a generator. We believed she was trying to sell it. She said nothing to him about being willing to give it to him. He was telling her he was worried that we would be kicked out of our home if someone bought the land. She didn’t say, “Oh you misunderstand, I’m giving it away.” She didn’t say, “You can have it.” She fed him some bullshit about getting rid of the other property and keeping this one.

It seems she gave the land away. She thinks it’s hilarious that we had to sell our home. She’s telling people he refused the land. How ridiculous is that? On top of that, if she was wanting to give it to him why didn’t she just offer it to him instead of posting on facebook? He even spoke to her, there was no mention of it. The chances of us even seeing the post before she found someone else who would take the land was low. This woman -tried- to hurt us, succeeded, and thinks it’s the greatest thing ever. How are people so cruel? We never did anything to this woman. I’ve only ever even spoken to her once, years ago, and it was idle chit chat about headaches. She called my kids trash. I’ve never understood how someone can purposely hurt someone else, but especially holding animosity toward a family and trying to hurt them when they’ve done nothing to you?

For a while we decided to look at real estate. I would find a place that would be great for our family, and it would sell the day I asked about it. We had 3 homes that had been on the market for a while taken out from under us that way. Then there was the home that the lady started out saying was still available, then at the last minute decided they didn’t want to move after all.

We decided to go to another mobile home lot. The guy looked at pictures of the driveway going to the property and said he didn’t see any issues in getting something up it. We put money down to hold a home they had on display that I was absolutely in love with, just for them to tell us a couple of days later that a mistake had been made and that was already sold. Are you kidding me? They have another on the lot with different colors. It’s hard to not be disappointed because I loved the grey color scheme so much, and am not nearly as fond of the all-brown in the “back up” home. When you’re paying SO MUCH for something like this, shouldn’t you LOVE it? Hubs doesn’t understand my disappointment, but he has promised to paint whatever I want. We’ll see if it grows on me first I guess.

The guys are supposed to be out this week to determine for sure that they will be able to get home up here. It shouldn’t be an issue, outside of a needed alteration to the driveway, but at this point we’re sure something will pop up.

At the end of May, the woman my boys have decided is The Bad Lady said that she would be here at the beginning of June. I told her that it was not a good time for us. She said she had already put in the vacation, and that she couldn’t change it.

While here, she dropped in one day to look at the shed. She wanted it unlocked, in case we didn’t want to be bothered. We unlocked it, she knocked on the door. She introduced herself enthusiastically, as though I was supposed to be thrilled that she graced me with her presence. She began asking about the title, and I couldn’t bite my tongue when she called my husband’s stepdad his dad. “Your dad, I mean, Cy’s dad…” I said “STEPdad, since this is your family it seems like you would be able to keep it straight.” My husband’s dad was her cousin, and died in 2006.

She informed me that she would be here at 10am the next morning to look at the inside of the home. Again, she skipped even trying to figure out when would be a good time for us. We had an appointment for when she said she was going to be here, so I told her I would leave it unlocked. She had told me that it would just be her and her measuring guy, but she brought her husband and sister as well. Maybe she thought I wouldn’t know, and didn’t realize that we have a security camera. It was maddening watching them look through the stuff on the porch that we have set to go to the dump. It was hilarious how they were seemingly upset that we had locked the shed back.

The next day while at the doctor’s office for the boys she contacted me to let me know she had made an appointment at a lawyer’s office to sign the title over. Again, not asking if we would even be able to do it, just dictating when it would happen. She told me the lawyer’s office was in the courthouse, I corrected her and told her it was in the old bank. She chuckled and said I would know better than she does, and I was like, “Yeah, I’m the one who lives here.”

We met at the lawyer’s office the next morning. Her husband sees us and yells, “GOOD DAY!” How crazy are these people? “We’re forcing you to give up your home, we’re forcing you to dance to our tune at our whim this week, you’re here to literally sign away your home when you don’t want to, GOOD DAY!” All I could do was stare at him. We sat as far away from them as we could, pandemic not even a consideration. We had an appointment, supposedly, but the lawyer wasn’t coming down to notarize anything. She pointed out that the title needed to be signed correctly or it would cause a lot of trouble. She insisted that it wasn’t supposed to be filled out on the back, when the back clearly said “Transfer by Owner.” When she tried to get us to sign it without the lawyer coming down, I insisted we were there for a notary and that signing without the notary present wasn’t legal. “The secretary just has to witness it.” The secretary ended up calling up to the guy and telling him that I wasn’t happy with her observing it. He came down, flipped it over, and had us sign the back. Like she knew we wouldn’t be doing. I took satisfaction in being right, but am still irked that the guy didn’t ask for any form of identification. Literally anyone could have taken that in and pretended to be us. It isn’t like he knew us at all.

A couple of days ago she sent a text to Cy, even though she’s been told to deal with me. She wanted to know if there were any updates. I sent her a text and confirmed we have until October 1. She said yes, she just wanted to know if it would be sooner. I lost it and bitched her out a bit. Back the fuck off, bitch. I told you that I would let you know when we had a move date. Things aren’t going smoothly, stop pressuring us and fuck off.

The land measuring guy came out and said that the chosen home would fit in the land. The septic guy came out and said that a double-wide would not work with septic, but he could make it work with a single-wide. We went to the dealership, chose a home, picked out all the floors and cabinets and such. The guy had to come back out to measure again for the new home and no dice. The amount of digging and earth-moving they would have to do to get it to fit going lengthwise instead of the other way would just be too much and we would be faced with a crater.

There’s another plot of land, but there’s a problem with it too in that to get it up to that area the home would have to be more narrow, and short.

In the meantime we’ve had to meet and sign over what we live in.

I’ve spent quite a bit of time just wanting to scream. We’re now cautiously hopeful about buying a home through a realtor. I start getting excited about the location and everything and then I remember everything has been a disappointment so far so it’s best to not get hopeful. Still, fingers crossed that this works out. Time is ticking and definitely not on our side.

I’ll never forget my husband telling us the amount the woman was “offering” us and saying we had to be out in two months. The look of heartbreak and betrayal on his face. The fear we both had in that moment. I remember screaming that she was a heartless monster and telling him to just hang up on him after he had brokenly told her that we have two small children. I could hear her heartless response, “Well…”

She ended up calling back and saying six months, and slightly upping the amount. My children understand that we’re being made to move, and they call her “the bad lady.” I haven’t corrected them because nice people don’t kick people out of their own homes. Over time I have told this woman everything wrong with the home, not wanting her to get pissed off and cause problems for us later saying she wasn’t made aware of this or that. She is fully aware that it’s going to be a fixer-upper.

As stressful as being kicked out of your own home during a pandemic while everyone is unemployed has been, we realize we’re very blessed. We have a safety net in family. When my husband was talking to “the bad lady” the first time, I called my mother-in-law in tears telling her what was going on. We have a safety net. With what we get for the “sale” of this home we’re going to put a down payment on a new home, and she’s going to finance it since we wouldn’t be able to with no income. We get a brand new home out of the deal, it’ll be on land my mother-in-law owns… right next door to this place. No mold, no sunken-in floor, bigger kitchen. She keeps telling us it’s a blessing in disguise. We’re trying to look at it that way but we expect hiccups along the way. Still, things are progressing and we’re not going to be on the street. We’re very thankful.

We’re in the phase now where the land has been measured and it’s confirmed that the home will fit on the land, so testing needs to be done to ensure we can have a septic tank. The land has to be dry, so of course it’s been rainy. Still, we have hopes that this will be done this week. When the inspector gives the go-ahead for septic, we can really get the ball rolling! I’ll be able to pick out colors and such for my home (I’m very excited for this part), we’ll start getting the land flattened a bit and utilities brought in.

As the boys ran around the yard looking for Easter eggs, my husband and I were discussing how normal an activity hunting Easter eggs was. In that moment we could almost pretend that we weren’t isolating ourselves from everyone. In that moment we realized that we were lucky in what security we have, that so many people have been struggling with bills and were worried about losing so much. “We’re lucky we own our home,” I said. We’re especially fortunate since he was let go from his job of 13 years in May of last year and has had no luck finding anything since. Owning our home has been a blessing we have held tight to.

That night we were slammed by a meteorological anomaly. The wind was severe. I remember turning on the local station to see what they were saying because surely they had broken into the programming to keep us updated. To my shock there wasn’t even a crawl on the screen. The wind was so insane my home was shaking. Literally shaking. The water in the fish tank was sloshing about, pictures on the wall were rattling. “This is it,” I thought, completely expecting us to be lifted up in the air like in the Wizard of Oz. I have ridden out tornado warnings in my cousin’s basement in Ohio, but this was the most scared I have ever been during a storm.

At some point through all the madness I heard what sounded like a tin can being opened, but on a much louder scale. That was the event that would change everything for us.

The power went out. The rain and wind died down, so we went out to survey what we could in the dark. There was a raging fire down around the curve. I called 911, unsure as to whether it was a structure or a blown transformer. The loud hum and mini explosions pointed to it being the latter. The fire burned until 6am the next morning. We were without power for almost a week. The NWS was perplexed by this storm and the insane destruction it caused through my area. They launched an investigation, having ruled out straight line winds and tornadoes since we had no thunderstorms. It was heavy rain and heavy wind. Yesterday it was reported to be gravity waves, which usually occur higher in the atmosphere.

The tin can sound turned out to be the roof on an abandoned house peeling back. We used to live in that house and even then it needed condemned. A few years later our home was purchased, and we rented the lot of land close to that home, owned by the same person. The roof of that house was the last straw for the land owner, my husband’s, who said if they couldn’t quickly find a buyer in the family they were going to deed the land and house over to the county. Another cousin stepped forward, and she promptly informed us that she was going to buy our home.

“At least we own our home.” What a joke. That doesn’t mean a lot if you don’t own the land.